Fixation Kills

From Wikipedia.org, the word 'fixation' means "the state in which an individual becomes obsessed with an attachment to another person, being or object (in human psychology)".

Well, I believe we use the word 'obsession' far more often than 'fixation'.

Obsession, is like your Panadol; it won't give you any good if consumed too little or too much. Consuming half tablet of it wastes your time while consuming more than two tablets of it at a time wastes your time and might cause you problems. The good of it comes when it's taken as how it is meant to be.

Obsession, in the other hand, is very similar to consuming Panadol. Light obsession might not have any significant effect on the person but being far too obsessed with something might cost the person his status, behavior, health, and life. Well, the case involving the last one I mentioned, 'life' is the least among all.
So the solution is, let our mind has power over our obsession and desire. It sounds simple because most of the things are easier said than done, but putting the solution into practice needs time and experience.

"How do I know I am getting far too obsessed with something? My life isn't as simple as taking Panadol."




Before taking the pills, be sure to have read the given directions. There you'll see the instructions saying that you have to take the pills before or after meal, with no more than two pills taken at a time.
If the small matter such as taking pills has to be done in the right way as instructed, our life too has to be lived according to the given 'instructions'. To make things short, for Muslims, we have been told to be modest in our actions.

“The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: ‘Faith consists of more than seventy branches. And haya (modesty) is a part of faith.’” (al-Bukhari)

Well, I presumed that if everyone followed that given rule, no one would be caught being too obsessed with anything or anyone.

Sadly, but inevitably that's not what is happening right now.

The examples of this case are too obvious if you do surf people's blog and their Facebook.
Well, blogging and Facebook themselves too are subjects of obsession. We see people spending hours sitting on their chair facing their laptop, just browsing what's in Facebook or writing sharing something too personal about their own life with the world in their blog while other chores and assignments are waiting to be done.

Let's put that aside,because the kind of obsession which is the subject of this post is more strongly related to the emotion and behavior of some people. Obsession with their special-opposite-sex friend.

I would say, that my foremost reason in writing this post is the situation where I am seeing couples, being happy, than fell to the bottom of the world crying, then later on they get together again, then one whole world knows about it, and the frequency of that happening is sadly high.It's happening far too often. *sigh*

I have observed, that some people who are too obsessed with their partner which is yet to be certified as a legal partner,in which I would say as 'spouse', are actually doing the same mistakes over and over again, although they think that they are not.

Example?
You were reading this blog which you used to read so often in your past but sadly nowadays you found nothing new in the blog except the sweet and super romantic words of a girl to his boy in her every post. Oh yes, and you can see the banner of the blog is now the picture of them. Aww, are you reading a couple's diary which is made public? One day his boy did something silly and she wrote to the world that she's crying and bla bla bla and says that "Oh girl, you are strong, this is not the end of the world living without him.." then few days later she wrote "My sunshine is back.*put love smileys here as much as you think she did*". Get a room! I mean, get another blog just for the sake of that. That person is making herself look too fragile among her other friends.

I myself wasn't elusive of the mistake in my past, so this post is written purposely as a friendly reminder to those who might be doing the same mistake.

Please bear in mind, that although it is innate human nature or 'fitrah' for human to love each other of their opposite sex, but as long as they aren't legally married, the boundaries are abundant.

"No, we rarely met and we didn't hold hands. I can swear."

But can you make sure that your thoughts aren't too focused on your boy or girl? Can you make sure that it won't affect your quality time with your friends? Can you make sure that it won't cost you your valuable time every time you have some kind of emotional conflicts with your partner? Don't you thing you are wasting your money on texting or calling your partner too often? Can you make sure that you'll be his/her partner during the wedding, which might be years from now? Then you say 'yes' to all the questions I've asked.

Then what if one day you and your partner are not meant to be together?

So you've wasted your thoughts too much on your partner. You might have neglected some of your friends because you are too immersed with the person. You might have squandered the valuable time you had for your studies of other things just to fix the relationship you once had. You surely have wasted your money too much on your partner. And the worst thing is, you never once made sure that you'll sit beside your partner during your wedding in the future.

And masyaAllah, you might have made Him second in your thought. Let's pray to stay away from that.

Again, it's like taking pills.
No one can guarantee that they'll be taking the same antibiotics for the rest of their life. Sometimes, they have to change what they are taking simply because it's no more working for them. So please don't waste your time too much on something that you can't make sure will last until you are done on this world, because you might be losing a lot more that you are getting. Be modest:)